THE CHILD CHOICES and the criteria for “messing up” are similar. Both “messing up” and THE CHILD CHOICES are emotional, irrational and have no concern for possible consequences. Impulsive or unconsciously determined CHILD CHOICES can result in “messing up”. “Messing up” such as addictions, criminal activities, relationship conflicts, refusal to care for health and all the other ways people “mess up” are similar to CHILD CHOICES. Both CHILD CHOICES and “messing up” are highly emotional, irrational and not concerned about consequences.
Although “messing up” and CHILD CHOICES are similar in their make-up, CHILD CHOICES should not be equated with “messing up”.
When responsible people equate “messing up” and CHILD CHOICES, they avoid making conscious CHILD CHOICES. The absence of conscious, CHILD CHOICES is a form of “messing up”. Consider how highly responsible individuals “mess up”. They usually “mess up” by becoming physically ill or addicted. Frequently, they have serious illnesses such as heart attacks. These illnesses meet the criteria for “messing up” and for CHILD CHOICES. When people are ill, they are highly emotional. From their perspective they make highly irrational choices like going to hospitals rather than working. Their illnesses are not planned and they do not consider the dreadful consequences resulting from being sick and not working. These unfortunate, individuals are not aware that they may avoid illnesses by taking time off work for vacations, enjoyment, and relationships or by making CHILD CHOICES.
There are many ways of “messing up”. When you avoid making conscious CHILD CHOICES, your inner child feels lost and rejected. The unrecognized child will react and will appear in “messing up” or self-defeating behaviors such as:
(1) Physical Illness;
(2) Psychological conflicts and symptoms;
(3) Addictions including, smoking, obesity, alcohol, drugs, and work;
(4) Relational conflicts and problems;
(5) Painful emotions such as guilt, shame, sadness, and inadequacy;
(6) Thinking problems such as worry, indecision, preoccupation, and confusion;
(7) Tension, pressure, and high stress levels; and
(8) Lack of success or success without the experience of success.
If you do not make CHILD CHOICES for yourself, consciously, CHILD CHOICES will still happen in your life. As indicated earlier many adults do not have CHILD CHOICES in their lives, as these adults are too responsible, industrious, and busy caring for others or their work. CHILD CHOICES surface when people are sick and unable to work. Sickness is often the result of not making enough conscious CHILD CHOICES. When people get sick, they have strong emotional reactions and are forced to stop their responsible activities until they have recovered. Illnesses and accidents force responsible individuals to make CHILD CHOICES.
Choose to have fun, enjoyable activities and the emotional reactions you really want. If you choose your CHILD CHOICES, then your CHILD CHOICES won’t appear as unwanted emotions associated with the failure to take care of yourself! It is very important to make CHILD CHOICES no matter how old you are. If you don’t make these choices, circumstances and your avoidance of making CHILD CHOICES will bring out undesirable, emotional reactions in you.
The above passages were from my book, I Live within the Environment Created by My Choices. No matter how old or young we are, we need to learn how to make conscious Child Choices.
Remember, We Live within the Environment Created by Our Choices!
Life and Mental Fitness Coach